I'm struggling at night.
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I’m struggling at night.
The nights are long and unsettling and try as I am; I’m not sleeping well. In the day I manage to avoid a confrontation with the ghastly reality of our lives with all sorts of distractions. I write and I exercise, I cook and chat with pals; so far the days pass relatively quickly and other than missing my team at VA it doesn’t feel altogether different. Truthfully, it is kind of relaxing – lunch is a longer ritual with a home-cooked concoction from me and night is devoted to another meal, a TV series and an early night. Exciting" No, but it is comfortable and safe.
Walking around our garden multiple times is how I start my evening bedtime ritual. 5 or 6 laps are meant to tire me out, followed by a long, lazy soak in an oil bath. (I am extravagant with this bath treat and decided with all that’s been taken away, it’s not so outrageous.)  Crisp sheets, the right temperature, and no more social media are meant to create the mental haven I need to fall into a deep sleep – and a couple of chapters of a current novel.

Guess what" It’s not working.
These happy rituals help me fall asleep but my subconscious wakes me every night in the early hours. I don’t wish to and I have even cut back on my jasmine tea and chocolate intake, hopeful a caffeine reduction might g...